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Анекдоты на английском языке

Vampires At The Bar

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
Three vampires go into a bar. The bartender walks up to the first one and says, "What can I get you?" The vampire says, "I want a pint of...

Three Brothers

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
A man walked into a bar, sat down, ordered 3 shots of whiskey, drank them, then left. This continued daily for several weeks. Curious, the...

Whose Profession Came First

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
A doctor, a lawyer, and an engineer are going out golfing. They are trying to decide whose profession came first. The doctor says, "My profession...

Golden Phones

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
It seems a man in Topeka, Kansas, decided to write a book about churches around the country. He started by flying to San Francisco, and started...

Deaths In The Family

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend, he comments, "You look terrible. What's the problem?" "My...

Those Are Some Cute Babies

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
A man was carrying two babies, one in each arm, while waiting for a train. Along came this woman seeing the two cute babies started asking the man,...

25 Ways To Confuse Your Professors

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
1. Brush your teeth during class. While doing so, raise your hand as if you have a question, and mumble your question incoherently while brushing,...

Why I fired my secretary

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday, and I wasn't feeling too hot that day anyway. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say "Happy...

Russian sientists

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem,...

Three Crazies

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
Three insane men walk out of a mental hospital hoping to escape. The first says, "If there's a high fence, we'll dig under it!" The second says,...

A quick solution to end unemployment

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
In the economics class, the teacher asked one of the students: - Can you come up with a quick solution to end unemployment? - Yes, sir! I would put...

The Harmonica Trial

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
A newly married sailor was informed by the Navy that he was going to be stationed a long way from home on a remote island in the Pacific for a year....

First Time At A Baseball Game

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
A Scottish man was at a baseball game. It was the first time he had ever seen the sport so he sat quietly. The first batter approached the plate,...

A Second Opinion

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog, screaming for help. The vet rushes him back to an examination room and has him put his dog down...

The Alabama Jumper

Дата размещения: 1.01.2003
A farmer in Alabama was driving across a bridge in his pickup truck when he noticed a man standing on the rail of the bridge ready to jump to his...

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